


someday, i’ll wait for you

by meikun



Series: 𝙝𝙦 𝙧𝙖𝙧𝙚𝙥𝙖𝙞𝙧 𝙬𝙚𝙚𝙠: aokoga/aogane ☆ 2021 [5]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst and Feels, Depression, Emotional Hurt, Flashbacks, Inspired by a Flower Face Song, M/M, Post-Break Up, Reminiscing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-05
Updated: 2021-01-05
Packaged: 2021-03-16 09:33:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28579794
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/meikun/pseuds/meikun
Summary: maybe god will let him sleep one day /maybe his dreams will fade away /where he tells himself that he’s over that wall /his heart knows all too well after all /
Relationships: Aone Takanobu/Koganegawa Kanji
Series: 𝙝𝙦 𝙧𝙖𝙧𝙚𝙥𝙖𝙞𝙧 𝙬𝙚𝙚𝙠: aokoga/aogane ☆ 2021 [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2086161
Kudos: 2





	someday, i’ll wait for you

**Author's Note:**

> here’s finally a longer fic for hqrpwk, one that i wrote while listening to my favorite artist ^^ enjoy

_“Sorry,” was all he uttered. “I’m sorry, it’s easier this way,” he said. It didn’t feel like it. A sad smile traced his face, before he closed the door. He waited, he waited for it to be a joke. He waited for him to come back. Yet, he was stuck, staring at a door that he knew would never open. Slowly, Kogane slipped to his knees. Silent with shock, he braced himself for impact, for when his mind finally processes it. It’s going to hurt._

It’s been months, and all he could do was stare out the window. Kogane hoped, he hoped so deeply that he would come back, that he would be waiting at the front door, waiting to come back. Looking back at the bedroom, he realized how cluttered it was. How dirty, how messy it all was. He sighed, and laid down on the bed. He didn’t have the energy to clean it. He didn’t see a reason to, anyways. When Aone was still living with him, he at least had a reason to clean up. Despite his messy ways, Aone always made him clean up the apartment. 

Now, he didn’t have anyone to tell him to clean up. 

Kogane picked up his phone. 

. . . 

_hinataa96:_ Hey Kogane hope you’re doing alright

 _hinataa96:_ If you need anything please tell me

1mo

 _hinataa96_ : The MSBY team is here for you!!

 _hinataa96:_ _hinataa96 has sent a photo._

_2d_

_9SakuKosuke6:_ heard you were going thru rough times, i’m here if you need any support ★

1w

 _Moni.wa:_ Hi Kogane! I heard from a friend that you were in a tough spot, don’t hesitate to reach out!!

3w

 _Kunimi_Akira:_ Hope you’re doing well

 _Kunimi_Akira:_ I know it’s hard 

_Kunimi_Akira:_ I know you can make it 

4d

. . . 

Nothing from Aone. He set his phone down again. 

Kogane had been overthinking a lot. His mind kept playing that day over and over, he wondered, he thought: what went wrong? What did it mean? Why? _He was so soft, so gentle. He wasn’t angry, he wasn’t hiding anything._

He swallowed, feeling a tension in his throat. 

Ah. 

It was just hitting him. 

He exhaled heavily, feeling a tear fall onto the pillow. Then another, and another. He sat up again, looking around the room. His vision, blurry with tears, was obscured enough by the darkness. Depressingly, he only kicked aside the clothes on the floor. _I’ll pick those up later,_ he thought. He never did. Later never came. Eventually, those discarded pieces of clothing became history. It was hard to pick up, it was hard to forget. It’s easier to just pass by it everyday, lying to yourself that you’re going to clean it one day. 

Pulling open the drawer, he searched desperately through it, clawing and throwing clothes he forgot he had. 

Underneath it all, was what he was looking for: a hoodie that Kogane took from Aone, stored away in the depths of his drawer. He buried his face in it. It still smelled like Aone. 

He felt himself slowly slipping to his knees. Weak with a bodied yearning, he felt like he couldn't breathe. He wanted to feel his body warmth again, he wanted to hear his voice again. With each sob, his body shook. He felt like a ghost, weeping for someone long gone. It was a heavy hurt, deep in his chest. 

He was gone, and Kogane couldn’t do anything about it. 

He pushed himself further into the hoodie, weeping a wet spot into it. He couldn’t do it. He couldn’t make it without Aone.

For the few months after Aone left him, Kogane told himself he was over it. He convinced himself that, yes, he was over Aone, he didn’t want him anymore. It was for the better. Deep in his heart, he knew he was lying. He wasn’t over it, and he would never get over it. Kogane remembered it clearly, it hurt as if it kept on repeating. He kept himself from texting or calling or leaving a voicemail or leaving an email and even from asking Aone if he wanted to come get his stuff or

He didn’t want to face the fact that Aone was gone. _Gone. Gone. Gone._

He lifted his head from the hoodie, and wiped his face, wet with tears. Exhaustion swept his body. His heart ached and his mind was overflowing, he wasn’t sure what he would do anymore. 

Walking to the bed, he dragged the hoodie with him. Perhaps he had an attachment to it; perhaps he had an attachment to _anything_ Aone owned. That coffee mug in the sink, the polar bear pillow on the couch, and even the green toothbrush that lay untouched on the bathroom counter. Kogane knew he should’ve thrown it all away after Aone left him, but he couldn’t. He still loved Aone too much, too much to throw his remnants away.

He looked at the clock, shining bright red numerals on the nightstand.

 **3:19 A M** , it blinked.

He sighed deeply, laying down in bed. He hadn’t slept well in weeks. He was unsure if he ever would. Kogane stared at the wall, his eyes blurring with tears again. Myriads of thoughts raced in his mind, filling his subconscious, filling the forefront of his mind. He shook his head and closed his eyes, burying his head in the hoodie again. 

It’s been so long, he forgot the color of his eyes.

How long has it been?

Somehow, he managed to fall asleep. On top of Aone’s old hoodie, with his body aching in exhaustion, he fell into something resembling a restful sleep. Maybe all of that crying changed something in him. 

  
  


He opened his eyes, feeling a comforting warmth wrapping him. Looking up, he saw a familiar face. 

“Aone,” he whispered. 

“Aone,” he repeated, leaning further into the hug.

“Aone, you’re here,” he murmured. 

“Sorry,” Aone replied, his voice barely a whisper.

Kogane closed his eyes tight. “Aone, I missed you,” he said. 

“If you leave, it’s okay,” Aone said, seemingly not hearing Kogane.

He was warm. Soft, as gentle as moonlight. Immersed in the arms of Aone, Kogane couldn’t look at him, not directly. It was too hard to look at him.

“... What are you saying?”

“Someday, I’ll wait for you.”

“Aone, please don’t go.”

“It’s alright, we can start again, in another life.”

“I love you.”

  
  
  
  


It was cold. 

He had forgotten the color of his eyes. 


End file.
